Today's Divination/Manifestation Practice

As part of my Divination/Manifestation Practice: Today I pulled the Lovers. In response I am invoking the Page of Cauldrons. In my experience love is something that manifests in infinite ways. Love is ever shapeshifting, ever undefinable, many things except still just one thing, all love is one love, recursively defining itself as in — love is love. It took many love(s) for me to see this and I know that my message is only my message and only relevant to me. The Page has a beginner’s mind. She steps out of the sea that is all our source and brings a message, your message, do you hear it? Many blessings to you today.

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As always when I speak of life, love and tarot I speak only for myself. This reading is part of my Divination/Manifestation Practice.
The Lovers is from The Modern Love Tarot, a totally awesome indie deck by EthonyThe Page of Cauldrons is from Branches of the Celtic Tarot, by Kristoffer Hughes

Lovin' Molly (1974) CNM Movie Review

 Unfortunately the list of movies and books of consensual non-monogamy (CNM) in a contemporary setting is short. In the 1970s, when I was young, that list was dismal. Paint Your Wagon was a standout but another title that deserves honorable mention is Lovin' Molly (1974).

In today's vernacular you'd call the story an MFM triad of two brothers in a polyamorous romantic and sexual relationship with one woman that was (um-mostly) consensual. It is based on Larry McMutry's lesser known 1962 second novel "Leaving Cheyenne" and the movie almost works. It has a star studded cast that includes young Anthony Perkins, Beau Bridges, Blythe Danner and Susan Sarandon. It's worth a watch even though it sadly falls short of its potential. That's kinda understandable given there was no real narrative for functional contemporary CNM at the time.

Bubbles and Buckets

 As Andie Nordgren said in The Relationship Anarchy Manifesto, "Each relationship is independent, and a relationship between autonomous individuals."

All relationships count. Sex is not a sorting hat. Love is a shapeshifter and takes many forms. We call this friendship, that romance and yet love is constantly reimagining itself. Who's to say what shape is the most valuable, at least beyond our own individual bubbles?

If you tear down the hierarchy of relationships and toss away the buckets we tend to sort relationships into a lot of the labels like "exes", "partner", and "lover" either gain new meanings or cease to have any.

Compersion - terms not specific to polyamory

 I think it's great that folks in the polyamory community come up with great terms to communicate dynamics in human relationships that were previously difficult to describe. It annoys me though, when sometimes they claim that those terms only apply to polyamorous relationships.

For example, this is how I explain "compersion" and jealousy. In my opinion, compersion is that happy feeling you get when you find out your best friend got vaccinated. Jealousy is what you feel when you can't get a vaccination appointment yourself then go on social media and see a picture of your happy best friend hugging their grandma; even though you're happy for them too. Moral of the story: compersion and jealousy are two separate things not polar opposites on a spectrum and not polyamory specific.

For Lovers and Fighters

 "One of my goals in thinking about redefining the way we view relationships is to try to treat the people I date more like I treat my friends — try to be respectful and thoughtful and have boundaries and reasonable expectations — and to try to treat my friends more like my dates — to give them special attention, honor my commitments to them, be consistent, and invest deeply in our futures together."

— Dean Spade, For Lovers and Fighters (2006)

A quest for knowledge

Sometimes a quest for knowledge finds the most you will know is the people you ask don't have the vocabulary to tell you.

Love Without Sex by Sophie Lucido Johnson, Review

I have just finished this awesome Audible Original: Love Without Sex by Sophie Lucido Johnson. It really explores the relationship of love and sex by looking at folks in both the polyamory (many+love) community and the asexual community and exploring the Venn Diagram of where those circles intersect. This raises lovely questions about love, sex, platonic relationships and friendships and the assumptions we make and how we experience and value all these beautiful human experiences. I highly recommend this!